The Empathetic Shift in Business is Happening
There has been an “empathetic shift” in both process and mindset in business from both buyers and sellers – and our sales leadership, sales training and sales enablement needs to match this shift…
There’s a significant shift needed in the sales industry: moving from extraction-based selling to collaboration-based selling. This topic is particularly relevant given the recent changes in both business buyers’ and consumers’ preferences and tolerances. Many buyers are looking beyond the bottomline or brand promise and evaluating our organizational values and community impact before doing business with us. Sellers are also looking for sales jobs that provide more than commission… they also need to provide purpose and mean something to the community and the marketplace.
Inspired by a Sales Troll
The original inspiration for my podcast on this topic came from an interaction I had on TikTok, which might be a bit controversial. I posted a video titled “Why Sales Is Not Like Dating,” which you can find on my TikTok @ShaneGibsonLive or on Instagram @ShaneGibson. The video received a mostly positive response, but one person disagreed, claiming, “Sales is just like dating, right up to the kiss,” and then in another comment called value-based selling weak. This prompted me to reflect on why such analogies are popular and to clarify my stance on the matter.
Sales Is Not Like Dating
I’ve heard many salespeople equate sales with dating, suggesting that if a prospect doesn’t respond after a follow-up, it’s like a disinterested date, and you should move on. I disagree. I believe sales is more akin to being a personal trainer or health and wellness coach. When a friend asks for help to get healthier, you don’t give up if they miss a session. You find creative ways to engage and support them. Similarly, in sales, persistence and respectful engagement are crucial.
@shanegibsonlive Sales is not like dating. It’s an innacurate analogy. #sales #dating #b2bsales #salestips ♬ original sound – Shane Gibson
The Relationship Arc in Sales
While I don’t think sales is like dating, it does resemble personal relationships in some ways. My seminars often discuss the five stages of relationship development: attraction, exploration, development, commitment, and unity. These stages mirror the progression of a sales relationship, but the focus should always be on collaboration and value creation, not on extraction or conquest.
Defining Professional Selling
It’s essential to define what professional selling means today. Everyone engages in some form of sales, whether persuading a friend to watch a movie or negotiating with a spouse. However, professional selling goes beyond basic persuasion skills. It involves a deeper level of expertise, ethical conduct, and value creation.
The Canadian Professional Sales Association (CPSA) has established three levels of sales certification: Certified Sales Associate, Certified Sales Professional, and Certified Sales Leader. Each level requires increasing expertise, experience, and a commitment to ethical and effective sales practices. I am also seeing similar competency maps emerging within the companies I work with – many of them weighing values, emotional intelligence, empathy, and ethics as being equally important if not more than traditional sales competencies and quota attainment.
The Shift from Colonial Mentality to Sustainable Collaboration
From Transactional to Collaborative
Our sales approaches must evolve to reflect broader economic and societal shifts. Traditionally, our economy operated on an extraction-based model, akin to a colonial mentality where value was taken from others with little regard for long-term impacts or mutual benefit. Companies and sales professionals focused on short-term gains, extracting as much value as possible without considering the broader consequences.
The Shift in Economic Models
Today, however, we’re moving towards a sustainable, collaboration-based economy. This new model emphasizes long-term relationships, mutual benefit, and shared value creation. Companies are now beginning to take responsibility for the entire lifecycle of their products, from creation to recycling. This holistic approach requires sales professionals to shift from a mindset of appropriation and extraction to one of partnership and collaboration, ensuring that value is created and sustained for all parties involved.
Changes in Sales Dynamics
From Road Warriors to Team Players
The traditional sales model involved lone road warriors, but today’s effective sales professionals work as part of a team. Collaboration within the company and with the community is crucial for success.
From Extroverts to Ambiverts
The most effective salespeople are no longer just extroverts. Ambiverts, who can adapt their style to different situations and clients, are proving to be more successful. Building bridges and holding space for clients are key skills. In fact the question “Who sells better Extroverts or Introverts?” has been answered empirically and it might surprise you.
From Transactional to Lifetime Relationships
Focusing on lifetime customer relationships rather than one-time transactions is essential. Building a community of clients who become advocates and unpaid brand ambassadors is the new goal.
From Persona to Person
Sales success today is about authenticity and transparency, not just projecting a polished persona. Building personal credibility and expertise is crucial. The good news is we stop burning up energy and resources projecting something we are not. Instead we can double down on communicating who we are based upon our unique strengths and outlooks.
From Male-Dominated to Inclusive
Sales is becoming more inclusive and global. Diversity in sales teams and client bases is now seen as a strength, bringing a variety of perspectives and skills. We still have quite a way to go but sales organizations are starting to look and sell like the diverse communities they are part of.
From Ego to Curiosity
Shifting from ego-driven to curiosity-driven approaches is vital. Being genuinely curious about clients’ needs and perspectives fosters better relationships and more effective sales strategies.
Building Skills for the New Sales Landscape
Business Acumen
Understanding your customers’ businesses deeply and how your products impact them is crucial. Expertise, not just experience, is what clients value.
Emotional Literacy
Developing emotional literacy—being empathetic, reading cues, and building bridges—is vital. This skill helps bring humanity into selling and creates effective sales leaders.
Conclusion
These are my thoughts on moving from extraction to collaboration-based selling. I believe this shift is not only necessary but also offers immense opportunities for those who embrace it. Here’s the podcast embedded as a Youtube video below that you will find some key takeaways and action steps you can personally and organizationally implement and adopt:
Top 10 Takeaways
- Sales is more like being a personal trainer than dating—persistence and engagement are key.
- Professional selling involves deep expertise, ethical conduct, and value creation.
- Sales relationships progress through stages similar to personal relationships.
- Collaboration-based selling focuses on creating value with clients, not just extracting value.
- The economy is shifting from extraction-based to sustainable, collaboration-based models.
- Effective sales professionals work as part of a team and build long-term relationships.
- Ambiverts, who adapt their style to clients’ needs, are more successful.
- Authenticity and personal credibility are crucial for sales success.
- Inclusivity and diversity in sales teams and client bases are strengths.
- Curiosity-driven approaches foster better client relationships and more effective sales strategies.
5 Steps for Implementation
- Adopt a Collaborative Mindset: Shift your focus from closing deals to creating long-term value with clients. Partner with them to find solutions that meet their unique needs.
- Develop Business Acumen: Deeply understand your clients’ industries, businesses, and challenges. This expertise will help you provide tailored solutions and build trust.
- Enhance Emotional Literacy: Invest in developing your emotional intelligence. Learn to read cues, be empathetic, and build strong, authentic relationships with clients.
- Build a Diverse Team: Embrace diversity in your sales team and client base. Different perspectives and experiences can lead to more innovative solutions and stronger relationships.
- Stay Curious: Approach each client interaction with curiosity. Listen actively, ask insightful questions, and be open to learning from your clients. This will help you understand their needs better and create more effective solutions.
By embracing these steps, you can transition from extraction-based selling to a collaborative approach that builds lasting relationships and drives success in today’s evolving sales landscape.
You can listen to this sales podcast episode anywhere you listen to podcasts including the following:
If this is the type of sales culture you’re looking to create and foster in your organization I’d love to talk to you about doing a sales keynote at your next conference!
